These next 4 episodes of Hospital Ship were such an emotional roller coaster I almost couldn’t handle the ride! The lows were so low, I almost lost my faith in humanity but the highs were so high, I felt myself practically floating among the clouds. With such drastic ups and downs, I found myself more than a little frustrated throughout these next few episodes. However, that frustration has been tempered with a few bright glimmers of hope that leave me thinking there are better things to come. I just have to have the strength required to endure whatever rocky storms may stand between us and the end.
I’d like to think I have the fortitude to weather any future storms, but just how frustrated will I get before those final credits roll? This past week’s episodes proved that moments of frustration are inevitable, but just how difficult will things become as this story progresses? I’d like to believe that we’ve come through the worst of things but I have a feeling that’s being a bit too optimistic. This drama has a knack for frustrating me, so to think that the worst is over seems like a pretty silly thing on my part. After all, Artist Choi is hanging around, and this girl is nothing but trouble.
Grrr! Just thinking about Choi Young Eun makes my blood boil! She truly is the lowest of the low. Selfish, unfeeling, brat that she is, I was willing to go easy on her after she announced she had been diagnosed with a rare form of leukemia. After all, you can’t blame a dying person for wanting to spend what little time they have left, with the people they love. However, this week we find that Young Eun isn’t dying at all. In fact, she doesn’t even have cancer! She made the whole story up, just so she could appeal to Kwak Hyun’s sense of decency. In short, she’s playing with a kind man’s emotions, just to get what she wants. If that’s not low, I don’t know what is! I may have my perspective a little skewed here (after all, cancer is something I’m painfully familiar with) but I’d like to think that even those who’ve never had to deal with cancer can understand how lying about having any form of the disease, to manipulate the feelings of others, all for the sake of selfish gain, is very, VERY wrong. What kind of a person does that!?! I mean really! I’ve seen a lot of drama characters do a lot of terrible things, all for the sake of bending other’s will to their own, but using something as life-altering as cancer is just too awful for words!
As uncomfortable as I am with Young Eun’s lies. I’m happy that Eun Jae knows the truth. The question is, what is she going to do with that knowledge? Is she going to continue to stand by and watch as Hyun is manipulated by the selfish artist, or is she going to step in a say something? I can see her not wanting to say anything that might appear to convey any sort of feelings on her part but I don’t think she’s the type of person who can just stand by and watch someone else fall into such a miserable trap. Eun Jae has a very strong moral compass and is driven by a need to see wrongs made right, so standing still as she watches Hyun sink farther into Young Eun’s trap would go against her very nature. Being torn between her feelings of justice and affection puts Eun Jae in a very tricky place. If she steps in to say anything to Hyun about Young Eun’s lies, she runs the risk of being seen in a number of different lights and not all of them are positive. Not that Hyun could see Eun Jae as anything but perfect (his rose-colored glasses are pretty much glued to his face, at least as far as Eun Jae is concerned) however, there are enough nosy busybodies around, the chances of being overheard and misunderstood are pretty high. Just look at the way Young Eun’s secret came to light! Not only did she reveal all to Eun Jae during that one ill-placed phone call, but one poorly timed conversation also revealed this secret to Jae Gul!
I think I’m more concerned about Jae Gul using Young Eun’s secret for his own gain than I am Eun Jae using it for hers. Eun Jae is so stubborn, she’d probably be happy keeping this secret for the rest of her life, just to avoid having to own up to her own feelings for Hyun. But Jae Gul… Now he’s a different story. I can easily seeing this jealous young doctor using such a vital piece of information to propel himself into a better light, at least where Eun Jae is concerned. If he could somehow use this information to either bring Eun Jae closer or drive a wedge between her and Hyun, I could easily seeing him doing just that. I know that Jae Gul has taken some very positive steps towards healing, and I’m very happy about that. But making this progress doesn’t mean he’s changed in his essentials. He’s still very much a hurting, wounded little boy who has never known what it means to love and be loved. If he continues to see Eun Jae as a means of reconciling with his family, he’s going to start moving in such a way that will ensure she stays by his side and that might not be such a good thing.
It doesn’t help things any, knowing that Jae Gul has mistaken feelings of gratitude as feelings of affection. Or maybe it’s more appropriate to say that his feelings have turned to those of duty… Last week Jae Gul admitted that he’d be more than happy to make Eun Jae his wife, as a way of repaying her for saving his mother’s life. As a highly skilled and well-respected surgeon, she could inherit the family hospital, gain a place of prominence in society, and never have to worry about anything ever again. When you throw in the fact that Jae Gul’s mother has already adopted Eun Jae as her own, this offer really is one that would be difficult for anyone to resist. Having Jae Gul admit that this offer is more a sense of duty than anything else only makes things that much easier for Eun Jae, as dealing with emotions isn’t her strong point. Knowing love wasn’t a part of this arrangement could actually be more appealing to Eun Jae than Hyun’s offer of genuine affection, as she’s utterly terrified of suffering the same fate as her late mother and estranged father. To solidify his position in Eun Jae’s life, all Jae Gul would have to do is use Young Eun’s secret in a carefully planned out and well-timed way and he could be set for life.
The only problem is, Eun Jae still turns to Hyun in her most desperate moments. He’s the one she called when she was stuck in Seoul, unable to get back to her freaked out little brother and code blue father. Hyun’s the one who is always there for her. Hyun’s the one she’s most transparent with. Hyun’s the one who’s always been there, to pick her up, brush her off, and encourage her to keep going. Hyun’s the only one who has ever seen the real Eun Jae and that’s going to be the one thing that brings her back to him in the end. Someday Eun Jae is going to realize that the only person she really wants in her life, is Hyun. She just has so many hurdles to overcome first, starting with this ridiculous “I can’t be with you because I don’t want to lose you as a colleague” nonsense.
I don’t know how many times I’ve heard people say, “I can’t be with you romantically because I don’t want to lose you as a friend.” More times, that I can count, that’s for sure, and every time I hear it, I say, “Codswallop!” Friendship is the strongest foundation for a romantic relationship. As a friend, you get to see people at their worst. You get to be there during their darkest hours and if you’re a good friend, you’ll be there with them, seeing them through to the other side. Getting through these moments together is what makes you stronger friends and better lovers. The same holds true in this situation, Eun Jae is just too afraid to admit that she’s come to depend on Hyun, as not just a colleague but also a friend. To admit that would mean admitting she’s unable to deal with life on her own and to admit that would be to admit weakness. As we all know, weakness is something Eun Jae simply will not tolerate, which is why she’s stuck where she is, trying to avoid Hyun, rather than face her true feelings. The stupid thing is, depending on others when you’re going through hardship isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. Admitting you can’t get through something alone is one of the bravest, most difficult things a person can do and Eun Jae needs to wake up and realize this if she ever hopes to live a rich, full, meaningful, life.
I think the end of episode 24 demonstrates this in the best way possible. When Eun Jae is walking through her darkest hour, when she’s exhausted all her resources and hasn’t a shred of hope, when she’s forced to accept the fact that she’s going to have to operate on her dying father, with very little chance of success, the people in her life rally around her in a way so moving, I couldn’t help but cry. The people in her life, those she’s spent the most difficult moments with, those she never could have imagined ever needing in her life, come together to support her, to encourage her, to be with her and in a way, carry her through this most difficult moment, and as a result, Eun Jae comes to realize that her once cold and gray world has become full of life and light and love. The question is, will she be brave enough to embrace this new world or will she try to run away? She doesn’t have a very strong track record when it comes to facing her true feelings but something tells me, this time may be different. At least I hope it will, for Eun Jae’s sake.
But what about you? What do you think? Do you think Eun Jae will ever be able to accept the love and affection of others? Or will she do as she’s always done and try to run away? How far do you think she’ll go before she admits her feelings for Hyun? How much longer will Artist Choi be able to keep up this disgusting lie? What will Hyun do once he knows the truth? Do you think Jae Gul will be the one to expose Young Eun’s secret or will it come from someone/something else? How do you feel about all of this family reconciliation? Are you as touched by it as I am or do you think that some sins are too big to be forgiven? Where do you see things going from here? Let me know in the comments below!
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